Hello, friends!
I am currently sitting at a cafe in Lisbon, Portugal, iced coffee in hand, watching people stroll by as I crack open my laptop and finally getting around to what I have been wanting to do...
Get all my thoughts out.
If you are new here - welcome to the shit show! AKA... my life.
It seemingly is a rom com (minus the rom)/drama/scary movie all wrapped up into one. Seriously, I don't understand how I get myself into the situations I do but hey, might as well document them.
I am currently living *temporarily* in Lisbon and I have officially been here two weeks (out of 6 total). At the start of each week, I have been journaling all of my thoughts, what I have learned and any + all reflections. Finally, I decided to take my chicken scratch handwriting and combine it into some blogs posts so I can share with you guys and also look back on this later in life.
I hate that everything we do is digital now - but it is what it is. I doubt anyone will be reading my actual journal and I sure as hell don't have time to write a NOVEL???
So here we are!
Living in a different country is wild, let me tell you.
But it's also... magical.
It's full of opportunity.
It teaches you so much.
So I wanted to document what I have learned as I reflect each week. Maybe you can relate? Maybe you can take some advice from this blog? Or maybe you can just read and be entertained. Who knows.
Before I get into my what I have learned in two weeks in Lisbon... here's a quick little back story (Cliff Notes Edition).
I turned 30 in May and I absolutely freaked out. I mean, don't we all?
I finally reached such a monumental milestone and to put it simply... I was not where I envisioned I would be in life. Where all my friends were getting married and having children and settling down.. I was traveling nonstop, didn't have a 401k and was in a long distance relationship with very little direction on what to do next.
Right after I turned 30, I flew to Australia to see the man I was dating (and very much in love with).
That relationship ended. Of course.
So I returned to America and said...
Shit.
What do I do now?
Well, that's kind of what led me to sitting in this cafe in Lisbon, sipping some excellent espresso.
I was 30, single, no children, not dating anyone.
On the FLIP SIDE... I realized I had a very flexible job, time open in my schedule and a desire to try living in Europe.
Hmmm....
Okay, but first one more back story to make this really make sense.
Three years ago, I left a toxic relationship. It was awful, full of gas lighting and cheating and after I finally walked away - I was left as a shell of the human I once was (P.S. if you relate... I promise it gets better).
Post break up, I decided to have a "YES" year. Where I said yes to everything that came my way - because I had spent so many years neglecting myself. In this 'Year of Yes'... a friend asked me to go with him to Lisbon. I had never honestly even heard of the city, I knew nothing about Portugal and I didn't even know what it looked like. I said, book everything and I will show up.
So he did! Cool!
Plot twist: two days before the Lisbon trip, my friend got in a bike accident and couldn't go. I had two options: I could cancel my trip or I could go solo.
As you can probably guess... I went solo. And I was F*CKING terrified.
Long story short (If you want to read more about that solo trip you can here): I absolutely fell in love with Lisbon and got to experience what it was like to fully thrive ALONE. This city healed parts of me that I didn't know needed to be healed and I actually extended my trip by a week, which was very unlike my Type A, planner self.
It was my first solo trip and my time in Portugal that summer truly changed who I was as a person. Which is absolutely crazy to think about where my life would be had I said no to going by myself and been too scared to take the risk.
Always. Say. Yes.
Ever since that solo trip in 2022... I have felt called to Lisbon. It's a place I keep going back to, a place where I feel at home, a place where I truly feel peace, joy and love. I can't put a finger on why I feel called here, but I knew that I couldn't settle down until I "lived" here for a short amount of time.
So here I am! 6 weeks of being a local in Lisbon, baby.
Now... do I know why I am here? Absolutely not. I keep telling myself "all answers lay in Lisbon" but if I am being honest, there may not be an answer. Or maybe I will discover the love of my life here? Or maybe I will feel called to move here? Or maybe the answer is having no answer?
As I am sitting here writing this... I have truly no clue. And that scares me.
But I know as the weeks go on, I will receive more clarity. And I am excited to look back on my time in 6 weeks and see where I am at and everything I have learned about myself since living here.
But for now... here's a look at what I have learned in my first 2 weeks in Lisbon.
LIVING ABROAD... What I Have Learned So Far:
- The quality of life in Europe is exponentially better than it is in America.
I can't really explain it in one simple paragraph and you really have to experience it yourself to fully understand. But beyond the great healthcare, the affordable prices, the beautiful views, the higher quality of the food... the people here just truly seem to enjoy life more.
Probably because wine is cheaper than water.
- Walking is the best medicine.
No, seriously.
I hit 10,000 steps easily before it even reaches noon here and my body has never felt better. Those aches, pains and constant inflammation I would feel at home? Gone. It's also no surprise that Europeans are very fit and healthy, well into their later years. I was talking to a friend about it and they said the magical key... was walking.
- Say YES... even when you are tired.
Especially when traveling. I almost stayed in the first night I got here because jet lag is a b*tch - but instead I forced myself to put on a cute little dress and I met some strangers for drinks. Those strangers quickly became amazing friends and in that one evening, I met a fabulous girl (also in her 30's, single, from Georgia and moved recently to Lisbon) and we became fast friends. & Now she is coming with me for a wild night out in Ibiza.
Say yes.
- It's really difficult to be present with a phone in your hand.
This has been mainly a lesson for me personally. But shit, it's hard to fully appreciate your environment when you have phone in your hand and you're trying to document everything or not miss a single email.
Take it from me: your phone can wait. Find a balance. Snap a photo and then put it away. Practice the art of the 'Later Gram' and also the art of an away message on email.
Work can wait, life will not.
- If you want something, you don't have to know where to start.. Just start.
AKA me trying to figure out how in the hell foreign real estate works.
Look, you don't always have to have a plan. I learned that the hard way. I am a Type A girl and I wanted answers IMMEDIATELY. I wanted to find a beautiful apartment and I wanted to AirBnB it out and I wanted to sign a dotted line and be done with it.
Life does not work like that.
It's messy, it's complicated, it's full of information that makes your head hurt and that you don't understand. But if you want something... you can't let that deter you. Just START with baby steps. Any step forward is better than no steps. And your answer doesn't have to come immediately, it may come in a year or even two. But you will never get anywhere if you just throw in the towel. Just start!
- There's more to life than dating and dating apps.
Stop asking single people why they are single. And if you ARE single, stop letting people pressure you into feeling like you have to be seeking out dates or be all over the dating apps... there is so much more to life than Hinge, Tinder, Bumble and Raya. And your worth doesn't come from how many dinner dates you have in a week with eligible bachelors (half the time they probably aren't even eligible).
Honestly, I came to Lisbon with the idea of dating. I think there was just something SO appealing about finding my "soulmate" in the city where my soul feels so at peace.
So I scrolled the apps, I matched with a few people. And it only left me feeling incredibly empty. But I felt so much pressure to get out there! To kiss some frogs! To have fun dating stories!
Moral of this story: I ended up deleting all the apps.
If it isn't enjoyable... f*ck society. Don't do it. If you are seeking a partner for the wrong reasons, you will never find the right person. And I realized there is so much MORE to life than dating. Maybe my mindset will shift in time... but for now, I just want to enjoy my time in my new city and I want to meet amazing humans without the pressure of "dating" - and that's ok. Bring on all the friends!
- Never skip a sunset.
Because “Sunsets are proof that endings can often be beautiful too.”
- If you should appreciate anything in life... it should be air conditioning.
Remember how I said Europeans have a higher quality of life? Well they also apparently don't sweat. And I do.
If you have an air conditioning... you are blessed.
- Work to live, don't live to work (there's too much to see and do!)
This is the main thing I have noticed in Europe. When it hits 5 or 6 pm - everyone seems to STOP working. They go to drinks, they have 5 hour dinners, they laugh and dance in the streets - even on work nights. They simply work to LIVE.
Make sure you aren't living just to work.
- Slow down, especially when it comes to eating.
I have realized I live my life in a constant state of hurry. I think that's just what we are used to in America. Eat quickly, because there's another table coming. Eat quickly at your desk because you have a meeting you need to take. Eat quickly, because there's something else on your to do list here.
Europeans seem to eat so slowly. It's almost like they actually... enjoy... their meals? CRAZY CONCEPT. But again... higher quality of life!
- You shouldn't be afraid of carbs and wine... you should be afraid of processed food.
Honestly, I was worried about spending 6 weeks here and consuming nothing but pasta, bread, sugar and wine. But it's crazy... I feel and LOOK physically better here than when I am at home eating clean and going to the gym every single day?
I started to rack my brain as to why and I had an "AHA" moment. The food here is not processed. At all. I don't eat anything in wrappers or anything that's pre packaged. I was even told that it is illegal to put hormones in the chicken here. WOAH.
This all taught me that while you may "think" you are being healthy (protein bars, low fat foods, low sugar drinks)... it really comes down to the QUALITY OF THE FOOD.
- Never take for granted time with your family.
Seeing my parents in Lisbon was unexpected but so, so wonderful.
It reminded me that our parents won't be around forever... they will age, they will move far from you, they will one day not be able to travel and see you. So appreciate every single second you get with them.
- Find beauty in the ordinary and the imperfect. If you're always seeking the extraordinary, you'll miss out on life.
This was part of the church sermon I went to last week and it really stuck with me (PS, if you are in Lisbon... check out Freedom City Church. So good).
God has given you life. It's a GIFT. And it may be ordinary, it may be boring, it may not be exactly what you want. But it's still a gift given to YOU.
Appreciate the ordinary and imperfect. If you are constantly looking for the extraordinary (cough, a perfect apartment and soulmate in Lisbon, cough).. you will miss out of the beauty that is life.
- If you feel something, act on it. If you it's on your mind, say it. Your intuition is an incredibly powerful tool.
I won't go into detail as to HOW I learned this in Lisbon, but it's a lesson that has come up recently with many relationships in my life.
You will never regret speaking your mind. I promise. You have an intuition and a voice for a reason.
- You will feel so much peace in life when you give it your all.
I think that's what I am the most proud of with this adventure. While it's not over yet and I am sure there are so many experiences left in store for me... Who knows if I will leave here with all the answers I came here for. I am not sure if I will leave with anything besides wonderful memories? And that's okay.
What I am the most proud of is I am giving it MY ALL. Every part of this living abroad experience... I am not leaving anything on the table. And that, my friends, brings me peace.
Thanks for reading and I can't wait to share more in the upcoming weeks.
Xo,
Morgan
